Film Review: The Ultimate Gift (and other things)
by Marissa Rubin
I desperately need sleep as I have an early run in a few short hours, but I must take the time to reflect right here, right now.
So tonight…picture me, Marissa Dale. Picture me in my obnoxious yellow jeep driving over the old St. Georges bridge with the moon shining as bright as ever and the sky clear enough to make out the clouds. Now throw in some tears.
The evening was quite enjoyable. I spent it chatting with my good friend Danielle in her hot tub over pina coladas (non-alc). She insisted that we watch this movie. I must say that I do not regret it one bit. It put things into perspective. Life is a gift from God. Although it is a vapor as it says in James, it is a crucial one. Not sure that made sense… There were so many lessons to be learned. It made me come to the realization for the first time in quite a while that work is a gift, that learning is a gift, giving, laugher, love. I felt selfish, and still do to an extent. Why have I not been loving with all my heart? Why have I not been giving of my time? Why have I not been laughing (in a sense) at the days to come as it reads in Proverbs 31? I could keep condemning my actions, but that would only demean my humbled spirit once again. It is a good thing to be humbled though, to have a kick in the pants from time to time. Here is a quote from the movie that I found appropriate to parallel with my life as of now…”Any process you are going through will get tougher before it gets easier. That’s what make learning a gift. Even though pain is your teacher.” Though I am by no means going through a pain-staking process such as most of the world, in my eyes these past months, few years now have been like H-E-double-hockey-sticks. Ok, maybe I shouldn’t be comparing my life to hell, for I know that in reality, hell is unthinkably worse than anything I could ever see or try to comprehend. Yes, worse than Mt. Doom or even NYC at night when the werewolves make their way out of their hiding spots. To finally make my point, these processes that I am undergoing will only make me stronger. I must embrace them for everything they are worth. I am seeing this now more than ever. I am finally really seeing it come into play. I was told on countless occasions during my time in Colorado of this concept. I may never fully grasp it, but I truly believe that I am closer than ever before.
Now…back to that inclination over the bridge…shifting gears (in both senses) and the tears…
Earlier on in the day I had popped in Tenth Avenue North’s album. This song played exactly when I needed it on the St. Georges. The lyrics struck me…
Why are you striving these days
Why are you trying to earn grace
Why are you crying
Let me lift up your face
Just don’t turn away
Why are you looking for love
Why are you still searching as if I’m not enough
To where will you go child
Tell me where will you run
To where will you run
And I’ll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don’t fight
These hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you
Look at these hands and my side
They swallowed the grave on that night
When I drank the world’s sin
So I could carry you in
And give you life
I want to give you life
Some of my own words were said to Him after I shut the stereo off. He is so incredibly good.
I hope that this (if even just a few words) post will inspire. I hope it is inspires you to love, to live unselfishly, and to live passionately. “Now to Him who is able to do incredibly more than all we can ask or imagine…” Let’s run this race, through the joys and the sorrows let’s run it and not burn out.